How To Speak Like A Leader With John Bates

Posted by John Livesay in podcast | 0 comments

23.02.22

TSP John Bates | Speak Like A Leader

 

Do you want to speak like a leader? There are two key things you need to remember. One, make sure you’re giving some context as to where you’re coming from. Two, be aware of the tone of your voice. John Livesay’s guest today is John Bates, the CEO and Founder of Executive Speaking Success. John is an in-demand executive coach and is one of the most prolific TED-format coaches in the world. And he’s here to help you out so you can communicate with confidence and credibility. So tune in to discover the science behind communication and how to use it to enhance your leadership skills. You wouldn’t want to miss this episode!

Listen to the podcast here

 

How To Speak Like A Leader With John Bates

Our guest in the show is John Bates, who’s an expert at communication and works with leaders at companies like NASA. Find out what the final criteria are on whether you can become an astronaut or not. Enjoy the episode.

Our guest is John Bates, whose mission is to bring out what is awesome inside people so that they can have the impact they want in the world. He’s an in-demand Executive Coach. He is also one of the most prolific TED-format coaches in the world. Executives from organizations like Johnson & Johnson’s, JLABS, NASA, including the astronauts, US Navy Special Ops, and Boston Scientific and more recommend him to their colleagues as the best leadership communication coach working. He knows the power creating a TED-like Talk can bring to anyone in business and life. John, welcome to the show.

[bctt tweet=”There is scientific proof that you get what you put out. People always mirror you. ” username=”John_Livesay”]

Thank you, John. It’s great to be here with you.

You and I have been personal friends for quite a while, and I’ve always admired your energy, passion, and your incredible ability to get people energized and discover their story to make it TED-worthy. Take us back to your own story of origin, if you will. You can go back to childhood or how did you know that this was something you wanted to make your career?

The short answer is I failed at everything else but that turned out to be a big benefit in the long run. I was always the guy, maybe a little bit like you who had the soft skills. I always worked with a lot of people who had the hard skills because I was always an early-stage employee or a Founder or Cofounder at companies that were in the internet space.

Starting in 1994, I was working with a lot of people who had hard skills. I would always end up being the Chief evangelist for my companies. I raised several hundred million dollars in Silicon Valley and beyond with my teams, and I still felt I was less valuable than the people who had the hard skills. I go around trying to prove I was valuable.

TSP John Bates | Speak Like A Leader

Your Amazing Itty Bitty Guide to Being TED-Worthy: 15 Essential Secrets of Successful Speaking Based in Human Neurobiology

They called what I did fluffy, even though I brought in hundreds of millions with my team. I had a chip on my shoulder and I was frustrated about it. I was going around trying to prove I was valuable. I didn’t think I was. I then went to the TED Conference for the first time in 2009. I saw person after a person gives the most amazing talks I’d ever seen in my life.

To my credit, I remember thinking, “I’ve been a public speaker my whole life but I’ve never done that. That was something else.” I came home and I got involved in the TED and TEDx community and at one of the first-ever TEDx events, which were in Santa Monica. That was TEDx Santa Monica was one of the first TED events but not the first. We had this guy who had all the hard skills. He had the most exciting topic and he was the one I was looking forward to.

When he got up on stage and started to speak, everybody in the room checked out because he was so nervous and awkward, we all thought we were going to throw up. It was unpleasant. I remember thinking how sad that was. I was incredibly sad because I’d seen that so much, often with many other people that I’d worked with.

Somebody who’s smart, has education and so much to offer but can’t quite communicate it. The evil part of me kicked in and I was sitting there going, “Laughing quietly to myself, of course. Hard skills guys blowing it. Calls what I do fluffy.” As I was doing that, my buddy walked over, Michael Weiss and he said, “We got to do something to help people like this.”

I remember it was like the V8 commercial. I could have had a V8. I swear the heaven’s pardon, the angel sang and it hit me like a ton of bricks that if I got over my freaking self, I could totally make a difference for that guy. I went home that night and started working on what I now get to deliver to all those places that I pinched myself when you read in my bio.

What I did differently because of that moment, is I realized if I wanted to talk to that guy and people like that, I would need to base everything I did in human evolutionary biology and human neurophysiology so I could show people, not what works but also why it works based in science. That’s where that all came from was doing public speaking for a long time. Having this epiphany at TED, and then having that moment when I was like, “Let’s look at the science of why this works.” I’m such a soft skills guy. It took me years to realize why this always works and it does always work because it’s based on science and that’s why we like science.

Gravity is gravity. It treats everybody the same. You’ve written a book about this called Your Amazing Itty Bitty Guide to Being TED-Worthy, and there are some secrets in here, as you said, based on human neurobiology. We all know what Biology is from being in school but what’s neurobiology?

Neurobiology is the specific subset of biology that’s like our brains, nerves, how our brain works and how it’s all structured up there, particularly in the brain but we have mirror neurons throughout our bodies. All kinds of things that it’s related to that cognition, mental behavior and how our nerves work.

For those who aren’t sure what mirror neurons are, it’s when you watch a scary movie and everybody in the theater jumps at the same time. We’re in the story. That’s what you want to do when you’re speaking. You want to mirror them. You want them to mirror you and go on the journey with you. You don’t have time to go into all these wonderful secrets. Do you have a favorite one or one that you see people need badly, so they don’t make a certain mistake from your book?

Maybe we could jump into the one you mentioned and we can unpack it a little more. Mirror neurons are neurons and all this neurobiology stuff. There’s always new cutting-edge work that points in different directions. The fundamental workable takeaway doesn’t change whatever the physiology exactly is, and the calcium pathway or whatever pathway. That’s not so important to me.

On some level or another, we have mirror neurons in our bodies. Mirror neurons helped us feel and experience what we see other people going through. If you watch me and I was doing a cooking show and I was chopping up big purple carrots off, and I cut my finger, everybody would jump because they would feel that because we’re human beings and we have mirror neurons.

[bctt tweet=”Being likable is a criterion to being an astronaut at NASA. ” username=”John_Livesay”]

I tell people that this is scientific proof for the fact that you get what you put out. The thing most people don’t think about nearly enough is that they are always mirroring you. When you walk in the door and you’re happy, everybody feels happy. When you walk in the door and you’re sad, everybody, “What’s wrong?” We do that with each other.

I always remind people to think about that person who’s grumpy. The person doesn’t say it out loud, and that person walks in and everybody gets grumpy. They grump around for a while and everybody acts grumpy and then they leave, and the minute they’re gone, we’re all fine again but everywhere they go, they think everyone’s grumpy.

It’s that Charlie Brown character where he’s always walking under a cloud of dirt.

That’s the grumpy person, and they think everybody’s grumpy but it’s not true. Everybody’s grumpy when they’re around because they’re grumpy.

This also applies not to speaking, whether you want to give a TED Talk or not, but also to leadership, because that saying, “One bad apple, causes everything to spoil.” You work with leaders, some of these big companies we talked about earlier. How do you help them get rid of that person whose energy is bringing down the whole group?

That can be dicey depending on where you are and all the things like that but the first thing that I would say with a person like that is if I were working with a leader who had someone like that on the team. First of all, don’t even hire that person. The final test to become an astronaut they told me is, “Are you likable?”

I didn’t know that. We’re going to be stuck in that little container with you.

Apparently, they didn’t necessarily check for that in the earlier days, and it led to some problems. Now the final test for a long time has been, you come up, you sit with the astronauts, you talk with them and when you leave, they all talk about, not only did they like you personally but do they think you are likable? You can pass that entire binder full of tests, and if you don’t pass that, are you a likable test, that final test to become an astronaut, people don’t become an astronaut. That is great for any entrepreneur and any leader. If it works for NASA and the astronauts, why wouldn’t it work for you?

We talk about this in terms of fitting into someone’s culture. Where you’re being interviewed or you’re interviewing people. I wanted to have these people over to my house for dinner, go for a drink or whatever it was. Our mutual friend, Tim Sanders wrote a book on this very topic, The Likeability Factor. There are tons of research on doctors spending more time with patients that they like and all of that stuff.

If someone has a little bit of self-awareness and they are very left-brain, hard skills person and they go, “I would like to be more likable or I would like to not be so negative but my mind is wired to point out all the potential problems all the time.” Is there anything someone can do to not completely alter their personality but move up a little bit on the dial where people would like to hang out with them a little more?

You said one of the keys, which is a little bit of self-awareness. If someone’s got some self-awareness and they want to move up that likeability ladder, which is a very good thing both for their own experience of life and for their career, know thyself. One of the things people can do after they know themselves is to put thyself on the loudspeaker a little bit.

Instead of being all covert about it and not saying it, you can own it. You can say, “I’ve been thinking about it and I was thinking about myself and how I am. I realized that maybe I might seem more negative than other people on this team. What I really think is that it’s my commitment to asking all the hard questions and I’m hoping that brings something. If it’s okay with all of you, I’m going to ask some hard questions.”

TSP John Bates | Speak Like A Leader

Speak Like A Leader: One of the keys to move up the likeability ladder is self-awareness.

 

Rhyming in that the intent, when you describe the intent of why you’re doing something. Does that completely change the framing of it? We also know how important tone of voice is and you’re an expert on this when someone’s presenting, whether on a TED stage or as a leader. Can you speak a little bit about how important the tone of voice is?

There are studies that show that 60% of all your communication is non-verbal and that includes tone of voice, even though that’s technically verbal. It’s not your message. It’s not what you’re saying. I don’t know 75% of your messages, John. It’s silly to argue about what the percentage is because here’s what I’ve decided.

Your non-verbal, your tone of voice, your facial micro-expressions, your body language, and all that stuff, let’s not think of that as a percentage of your communication. It’s much more powerful to say that is 100% of the context within which your communication gets heard. If I’m looking at you and I say, “John, I care about you. I’d like to make a difference for you,” and I’m sketchy, looking away from you and I can’t make eye contact.

“Give me your wallet because I care about you and I want to make a difference for you.” You’re not going to trust me and that’s going to land one way. If I look you in the eye and I say, “John, I care about you. I want to make a difference. Can you give me your wallet for a moment and watch what I do?” You’re going to be much more likely to hand me your wallet and see what I’m going to do because I looked you in the eye. I came across this trust. Where all that non-verbal stuff was aligned with my message, and if your non-verbal is not aligned with your message, does that damage your message.

That tone of voice and being clear, a big thing is being clear where you’re coming from. For that person who maybe has negative stuff to say at the meeting about every idea. If they come at it like, “Everybody in this room is such an idiot. Here, I have to tell you again like this is so dumb.” That’s one place to come from.

You say all the things that are wrong with the plan but if you’re coming from the point of view of, “Everybody in this room is committed to success. We’ve got a lot of great brainstormers and we’ve got a lot of people with great ideas. Let me be the person to bring the pressure and reality test to this. Here’s what I have to say about it.” You could potentially say the exact same thing but coming from those two different places, it will land 180 degrees different.

The takeaways for all the readers are two things. One, make sure you’re giving some context as to where you’re coming from and then be aware of the tone of voice. Are you coming from a scolding parent? I remember years ago, hearing that people either communicate to you as a parent, an adult or a child and that all very much tone of voice usually.

[bctt tweet=”Bring vulnerability to your talk. ” username=”John_Livesay”]

Being aware that nobody wants to be reprimanded, scolded and nobody wants to be treated like a child. You run a bootcamp for leaders on the necessity to speak like one. Just because you’ve been given the corner office, the title and all the perks that go with it, doesn’t mean people will follow you. I love that definition of a leader that people want to follow them. Can you give us a little behind curtains look at? What do you do in this boot camp that you run for these leaders and what kind of leaders are they?

I’m working with leaders that they’re running big pieces of big companies. What I notice is that the best of them is always looking for the next level of great communication and leadership. The ones who have the trouble or the ones who think they’re already good and don’t need to put the time in on it. In this course, I call it the Speak Like a Leader Bootcamp. Even if you are a leader, there’s always a new level of speaking and communicating like a leader.

What we do in that course and it’s very purposeful for leaders. We go through the experience of creating a TED-like Talk and over the decade of doing that with so many different people from so many different walks of life for TEDx events, for the corporate world and everything. I’ve come to believe that is one of the absolute best leadership exercises anyone could ever go through, whether they’re going to give a TED Talk on a stage or never going to do that. All the things that we go through in that course have leaders step into themselves in a whole new way. You got to be clear with yourself because you can’t be clear with anybody else if you’re not clear with yourself and get inspired by yourself.

If you aren’t inspired by yourself, it’s a lot harder to be inspiring and inspire people. We go through all these steps that I’ve distilled over the years, working with these people on these talks, and it ends up being a great leadership exercise. People come out the other side with whole new levels of courage, confidence, leadership presence, being inspired by themselves and by the people around them. Reinspired is a really fabulous experience.

I know for myself that when I get hired to speak in front of a sales organization, that particular talk has a lot of metrics. Are they learning new skills that are going to help them close more sales? When you give a TEDx Talk, it’s a very different mindset and framework.

Absolutely different animal. People get messed up by that a lot. They walk out on stage, having worked so hard on their eighteen-minute TED Talk but they didn’t get the difference in format, and they walk off stage disappointed. It’s not pleasant.

Some of the stories that you might create for a TED Talk would make your existing business conversations so much more compelling, and part of it is going back to the mirror neurons. If you’re opening up and being a little vulnerable or telling a personal story of when you weren’t always perfect, and things weren’t always easy, people can relate to you in another way that allows others to see the cracks sometimes.

I couldn’t say it better. I might add a little bit but that work that people do in a TED-like Talk is one of the things about TED-like Talk is they’ve got to be vulnerable. It’s one of the TED commandments. When people bring their personal self to this talk and they bring some vulnerability and some insight that they got out of the failure they had, and tell us about the hard times that before the good times, people walk away in love with them. Why wouldn’t you bring that to your sales talk? Why wouldn’t you bring that to your all-hands meeting? What we see modeled in the corporate world in terms of communication, connection, how people speak and everything, I’d say 90% of that is not only not what works best.

I’d say about 80% to 90% of that is the opposite of what works best. People get up in a business talk or a first sales meeting, and they think they need to establish their credibility. You don’t need to establish your credibility. They want to let you in the door if you don’t have credibility. Your credibility is already established. What you need to establish, and this is going to be the title of my next book. I’m coining it.

Instead of establishing your credibility in that first conversation, you need to establish your emotional credibility. Why can they trust you? Why can they believe in you? How can they connect to you? Fundamentally, this is another huge piece of neurobiology and I’ll bullet point it, if you’ve ever had this experience, when you go in and you’d get yes, yes, yes, no. “Yes. We like to borrow that guest. It’s first try. Yes. We think it would make a difference. No. We’re not ready. We want to think about it.” That’s never happened.

What that is, is yes, yes, yes, no. That means no. That means you didn’t get the sale but what’s happening there, people say, “Were they lying to me? What were the three yeses and then a no?” Here’s what happened. Yes, yes, yes, no. That’s logic, logic, logic, emotion. We did not make the emotional. Yes, they want it, of course, it’s a great product. You wouldn’t be selling it if it wasn’t a great product. Logically it’s all there but what we didn’t do is make that emotional connection. Give them a way to connect with us, be in the same tribe with us and all that. That’s what gets what I call the fourth and most important yes.

TSP John Bates | Speak Like A Leader

Speak Like A Leader: Be aware of the tone of your voice.

 

Partly aware that people buy emotionally, and then back it up with logic instead of pushing out all the facts and figures. I remember working for a publisher who had come from another situation that was very complex. I was asking her about it, and she said, “Yes, there were a lot of moving pieces.” I thought, “What a wonderful framework she has as a leader to not get overwhelmed.” I thought, “Certainly if you’re at NASA, that’s a lot of moving pieces.”

That mindset of what you see working at NASA and how that can be applied to the business world, I thought you might have some insights into some of the skills in addition to the likeability being so key that, talk about staying calm under pressure. Many movies are made about this but when you’re working with those leaders, do you think they have had training in this or is it a personality trait that they screened for?

The first thing that comes to mind is, you got great people working at NASA and there are two big things that come to mind for me around that. One is your most important job as a leader. It is to always be creating, speaking, and reminding people of the empowering context for what you’re up to. We’re not here shoving widgets around. We’re not here moving pieces of metal and machining parts. We’re sending people to the moon.

We’re exploring the frontiers of what’s even possible in reality. NASA has a pretty natural building good empowering context. One of the things about many of the leaders that I’ve talked with there is you’re not going to go to NASA, get the job and work that hard if you’re not inspired by it. They’re inspired by the context of what everyone there is doing. One of the key things NASA gets maybe more than most organizations is, how absolutely impossible anything any of them are doing without everybody else.

They’re talking about admissions. They have the missions that they do, and then we have corporate missions. They are a great example, and you’ve certainly had a front-row seat to it, of implementing that mission and the need to collaborate. John, if people want to reach out to you to learn how to be a better speaker or maybe do a TED Talk or hear more about your Speak Like a Leader Bootcamp, where should they go?

There are two places in there, pretty similar. One is ExecutiveSpeakingSuccess.com. I do one-on-one executive coaching. I do large and small group training, virtually, in-person and all that stuff that you could expect from someone like me. You can find out more about it there. If the idea of creating a TED-like Talk as a leadership exercise sounds, maybe it sounds like something that you would, “That sounds terrifying,” you should go check out Ed, which is for education Ed.ExecutiveSpeakingSuccess.com. We run that course about four times a year. It’s an eight-person cohort. It’s a ten-week class. It’s pretty intense and it is absolutely inspiring, beautiful, fun and amazing. It makes an enormous difference. Not if you want to give a TED-like Talk somewhere or speak on a TEDx stage or something but also if you’re selling.

[bctt tweet=”Stories are like songs. People don’t mind hearing them more than once.” username=”John_Livesay”]

What you teach people about so much, John. You can bring that emotional connection of a TED Talk to anything and why wouldn’t you? Why wouldn’t you bring that to your leadership, your sales, your all-hands meeting and to the board meeting? The things that people create in that course stay with them for a lifetime.

It’s a ten-week investment that will pay back over an entire lifetime. The stories that you choose, craft, and tell in that course will become some of your greatest hits. Stories are like songs. People don’t mind hearing them more than once, and when you get a good story and you can tell it well, keep using that thing. If it’s a new audience, don’t tell a new story, tell that story that you’ve been perfecting and that just you know exactly how it lands and keeps making it better.

I love that quote, “Stories are like songs.” We’ll make that one of our tweets as well. John, thanks for sharing your passion, your insights, your great stories about how NASA decides, whether you get to be an astronaut or not. I love that. I’m looking forward to hearing how many people take you up on your offer to get your book, Your Amazing Itty Bitty Guide to Being TED-Worthy or make the jump and are smart enough to get into your Speak Like a Leader Bootcamp. Thanks again.

Thank you, John.

 

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How Business Can Build Resilience And Thrive In The Middle Of The Pandemic With Gail Davis

Posted by John Livesay in podcast | 0 comments

21.02.22

TSP Gail Davis | Resilience

 

Anything can change in a blink of an eye. We cannot dictate what we want to happen in this uncertain world. Join your host John Livesay as he sits down for a conversation with Gail Davis on developing resilience during tough times. Gail has decades of experience in corporate marketing and event management. In this episode, she dives deep into how the pandemic brought changes globally, especially in her business which involves in-person events. She experienced letting go of employees to survive. It was definitely hard, but she believes that the pandemic opened up other opportunities for events in a virtual way. People had to adapt to using the current technologies to help them move forward with their businesses, which paved the way for innovation.

Listen to the podcast here

 

How Business Can Build Resilience And Thrive In The Middle Of The Pandemic With Gail Davis

Our guest is Gail Davis, you might remember, she was a guest back in January 2019. She is here to talk about how she navigated the challenging pandemic, especially to the speaking bureau world where live events were all cancelled. Some great takeaways for us about us for us about how, when you anticipate potential challenges, you are able to respond with an action plan as opposed to reacting from fear. Enjoy the episode.

Our guest Gail Davis was on the show in January 2019. Her decades of experience in corporate marketing and event management served as the launchpad for GDA Speakers. Before establishing the company in 1999, she spent years managing the events of the Dallas-based global technology conglomerate, EDS, Electronic Data Systems founded by the famous Ross Perot. While at EDS, she discovered Nando Parrado, a heroic survivor of the 1972 Andes plane crash. He presented an unforgettable speech at the EDS marquee event.

After his successful keynote, he signed an exclusive agreement with Gail. That was her first beginning. We were talking about how much life has changed for everyone in the speaking business and every business around the world since 2019. We had the pleasure of reconnecting in person at Josh Linkner’s event in Detroit. I said, “I would love to have you back on the show. You were such a great guest.” She said, “I would love to come back and talk about what the impact the pandemic has had on my business and how I have pivoted and maybe help some other readers and entrepreneurs do that. Gail, welcome back.

I am glad we made this happen. I feel like I have lived 1,000 lines since we did our first show, which was in early 2019.

It is that whole premise of, we think we have a sense of how the world operates and that we can always get a haircut when we want to. We can go see our friends and family when we have a meal, let alone live events going away. That wasn’t even on our radar of things to prepare for.

[bctt tweet=”Those who act quickly will survive.” username=”John_Livesay”]

That happened to be a leap year. On February 29th, I went to see the Eagles. That is a large concert in an arena, lots of people dancing, singing. The next day, I drove to Oklahoma and I stopped to see my mother. I said, “My business is going so great. 2019 is going to be the best year ever.” I have a fully trained team that has been with me for a long time. I am in a place where I can get away. Everything runs like clockwork.” That was Sunday afternoon, March 1st. On Wednesday, we had our first cancellation. By Friday, we had six and then the tsunami hit.

Let me ask you because so many have that experience of, “This is unraveling. It is no longer a thread in a sweater. This whole thing is coming apart.” At the time, none of us knew how long this was going to last. What was going on in your head? We were both former lifeguards. For me, as a former lifeguard, the training that I had to not panic and stay calm when someone was drowning does kick in sometimes. It can help us in those situations. What was your initial reaction? As a leader and running a big company and having people whose livelihood depends on you and your business, what went through your head? The second question is how did you keep other people from panicking?

I have a very vivid memory of that first weekend in March 2019. One of my colleagues from another bureau called to tell me that an event that was to have played in April of 2019 with Nando Parrado, he was supposed to be in person in Dallas, that client had decided they needed to reschedule. I said, “How are you feeling about all this?” He said, “I’m trying to save the company but I will talk to you tomorrow morning.” That Saturday we spoke. He had been on the phone with one of the sharks from Shark Tank. As he was hanging up, canceling an event, he said, “You have a lot of experience in running a business. What advice do you have?” The advice was those who act quickly will survive.

He told me, “You should run three scenarios with your existing payroll and expenses.” This is March 5th or 6th, 2019 that he is telling me. “Scenario number one, there are no live events between now and May 31st, 2019” I was like, “You have to be kidding. There is no way.” He said, “Scenario number two, no events between now and August 31st, 2019. Scenario number three, no events in 2019.” He was so confident in giving me that advice that I picked up the phone and I called the person that does my bookkeeping and accounting. I said, “I need you to run this for me. We should meet at 8:00 Monday morning to look at the results.” I don’t know prior to that in business, not life, I had seen anything so sober.

I am not willing to go in a hole that deep. What can I do? To answer your second question, I decided at that moment that full transparency and complete honesty was the only way I can handle any of this whether it was talking to a client or my team. I called the team in and I said, “In the last 3 business days, 5 days if you count the weekend, we had 7 events that have been impacted. We don’t know where this is going to go but I want to share with you these 3 scenarios.” That first Monday, I planted the idea. On that day, I let three people go. That is not my style. My style is to try everything under the sun. I almost felt like I was doing him a favor like, “Get down there and get in the unemployment line because the rest of the people are there.”

TSP Gail Davis | Resilience

Resilience: At the start of the pandemic, full transparency and complete honesty was the only way you could handle your business, whether it was talking to a client or team.

 

I’m happy to say one of those people ended up coming back. PPP came along. We were able to stretch it a little bit longer but we are well into scenario number two. We had to let other people go. Scenario three came and went. To be completely honest with you, 2021 was a tough year. It was better but it was still tough because we are still talking about whether it’s variant D or Omicron. Lockdown or not, we are in a global pandemic and it is impacting this industry. That is what I hope we can dive into because when I sit back and I look back, I have a handle on what the good is that we can take away and some sage advice on how to move forward because the one thing that is cliché but true, we don’t know what we don’t know.

As a sales keynote speaker, I thought to myself, “I have to figure out a way.” I had a client say, “This live event, April 2020 is not happening. I’m going to push it back to August 2020.” When that came, “We are going to make it virtual.” How are you going to keep 300 people entertained on a Zoom call? That is what made me realize I have to do something. Zoom burnout became an issue. There are so many new challenges. The funny thing I thought was interesting is sometimes in these challenging situations, other opportunities come up.

In my case, the client said, “In addition to your keynote and workshop, can you teach my team how to look and sound good on Zoom? They are so uncomfortable being on camera and they don’t know how to frame themselves or like themselves.” I thought, “I’m one chapter ahead of you on that.” Trying to order equipment during the pandemic, there are a lot of people wanting professional lighting and mics. It was interesting that became a new need that never existed before. There is a technology that allows me to do some special effects.

The people whether you are a speaker or a bureau owner like you that say, “I’m not going to offer anything or invest in learning anything new unless I am dragged into it last minute.” I thought, “That is not the speaker I want to be.” If there is some new way to keep people engaged, I want to be at the cutting edge of that. It’s going to cost me some money when money is not coming in like it was to invest, learn and get the equipment. I’m going to do it as opposed to waiting until somebody asks me to do it. I wanted to hear if that resonates with you as a bureau owner.

One hundred percent. I remember a conversation with one former employee. I might qualify her as a slow adapter was, “I’m going to go with virtual. I’m going to wait and I’m going to say my specialty.” Which are in-person events. That would not work well for anyone. I love watching speakers. I feel like there are speakers that got on the front end of the technology. On March 10th, 2019, they were building their in-home studio and they were ready to roll. Others sat back and watched, “Who is doing this well? What can I learn from them?” They came into the game. There are some people I love and respect who still are sitting on the sidelines because they don’t think it works for them.

[bctt tweet=”Cross-train your team to build empathy.” username=”John_Livesay”]

For me, I knew that we had to change. I can think that to my first office in Colleyville, Texas, where we had a wall of VHS videotapes that were out the alphabetical by speakers’ last name. We used to buy blank tape and the box scrolls. We had two VCRs. If somebody wants John Livesay, we go grab your tape. We plug it in. We put a blank and we press record then we send the VHS tape in the mail to the client to watch. That is not how it works these days. Only knowing how to do in-person events is like only having VHS tapes. We had to learn it.

My first thing to my team was, “If you don’t already know Zoom, figure it out. Do you know what Teams is? Has somebody talked to you about StreamYard? I need you to get on there.” There were so many that came in at the beginning. “Everyone, I want you to learn.” The funny thing is you showed me your new toy, which is that Stream Deck. I have been doing this for months and I have never seen Stream Deck. The innovation in our industry is ongoing which is one of the gifts of the pandemic for our industry. You can look at it. People are like, “I want to go back to normal.”

I’m not sure normal is ever going to be the way it was in 2019 but there were so many gifts. Most of our sales calls are via Zoom. Prior to 2019, most of my team probably did not have a Zoom account. There are a lot of gifts. I wrote a blog. I used the line that I borrowed from a friend, Sean Hanks is the IASP President. He said, “Virtual events have become an and versus an instead of.” People who for many years had these three in-person events may now go back to those three in-person events but they may be augmenting with this August 2019 event that is going to be virtual because, in the pandemic, that was a home run.

It makes sense to keep that going. I love that. It’s not like, “We are going back to in-person. Virtual is going away.” Virtual is here to stay. There are instances where it makes sense. With international travel, it may be a long time before every person from every country can travel with this. There are a lot of gifts that have come out.

I did a keynote to a company based out of Israel and their entire sales team is global. One person is in Singapore and one person is here. Instead of having to fly everybody in, I was part of their annual kickoff meeting for the year. When I first came to Austin in March 2020, I was all excited. I had my tickets to South by Southwest. When they canceled that, I thought, “This is not something that is going to be fixed in a few weeks.” Here we are in March 2022 and it is still iffy if that is going to come back.

TSP Gail Davis | Resilience

Resilience: The innovation in our industry is ongoing and which is one of the gifts of the pandemic bark industry. You can look at it.

 

Elton John was going to have two nights in Dallas. He tested positive. He canceled. There is an uncertainty in making plans that are becoming the reality of how we move forward with just about every personal or business decision.

A new skill is required because when I gave that talk down at the healthcare company in San Antonio, they said, “There are only going to be about 25 people in the room. However, we are streaming you live to 500 people so you have to speak to the room and the camera and not forget that there is an audience out there watching.” It was a fascinating hybrid experience. The fun part for me is when a client embraces the change. He said, “I have been talking about you and your book to my team about Better Selling Through Storytelling.

Instead of the normal way of introducing you by reading this introduction, we are going to put you in a private room next to the conference room. We will keep the door open and I am going to start talking and say I have been wrong about the power of storytelling and sales. We should not try and do this anymore. I want you to come in and interrupt me and say, ‘Cut, don’t listen to him. I’m here.’” I thought, “What a great way to break back into a live event.” Be that playful with your clients. It is the people that are willing to keep rolling with the disruption because that is what our brain craves.

Is this going to be the same old? When you have something new like that, it grabs the audience’s attention. You said that you feel like there have been some good takeaways. I gave an example of a client asking me to train their sales team on how to look and sound good on a Zoom call and not be intimidated if the other person keeps their camera off. It is fascinating what stresses people out. What would you say has been a good takeaway? Is the team closer than they ever have been getting through this?

Yes. I believe the team is incredibly cross-trained. When we did our last show, I had twelve people on my team. At one point in the summer of 2019, I went down to what I lovingly referred to as the core four. Those four can do anything other than run payroll. As we would add that in one person that summer, I remember when I was interviewing her she had prior bureau experience and I said, “I need you to do this. Sometimes I might need you to do this.” She said to me, “You need me to catch what needs to be caught.” I was like, “That is what I need.”

[bctt tweet=”Virtual is here to stay. It just makes sense to keep that going even after the pandemic is over.” username=”John_Livesay”]

She came on. She is super cross-trained. That is a very big gift in terms of the team’s closeness. When you are super solid and you haven’t sat in the seat of your fellow teammate, it is easy to get super irritated with them like, “Why are they aren’t meeting this deadline?” We have some new people that this is not the case but the majority of the people on my team are super cross-trained so there is a lot of empathy and understanding of the competing priorities. That is a positive for the team. In terms of the value that we add to clients, our skill or anticipating things we need to consider in the contract is at an all-time high.

Pre-2019, you want John, you want him in Austin and you want him on this day, contract done. Let’s move on. Now we are asking the question, if something prevents John from being there whether John can’t travel, you decide to go virtual, there is a government restriction implies. There is a new variant. I could go on and on. Let’s go ahead and discuss what that looks like. A lot of times they will say, “We are only going to do it in person.” We say, “Let’s talk about that. Do you want to kick the can down the road or do you want to have a contingency? What are we trying to accomplish?”

Sometimes if you are trying to train your team and keep the momentum on your team going, rescheduling the event to a later date is not necessarily the best. We get into a discussion of, “If he didn’t come in person, would he give us a reduction on the fee for virtual?” We have to navigate that. Anticipating and having the conversations that everybody is so tired of having but making sure we have them, we are better prepared. When I looked at how many events were impacted by the original Coronavirus, I still have 8 things we haven’t resolved out of 200.

You go to the Delta variant, we only had 23 and all the 3 are resolved. We know what we were doing, we are just waiting for a signature. So far, we have only had sixteen on Omicron. It is only two weeks old but about half were already resolved. That directly ties to anticipating, thinking, contingency, covering things in the contract. It is a little bit of a pain because you have to do a quick agenda but you have already thought through it. That is a time-saver to everybody because these variants coming up right before the event and we don’t need to be exploring options. We need to implement options.

That is a true sign of a good leader whether you are leading thousands of people, 10 or 4. Anticipating a need. I remember when I had the Banana Republic as a client and they said, “We want to redefine what luxury is. We are never going to be Neiman Marcus in terms of pricing but what if it was anticipating a need before you knew you needed it?” They put a place where you could get your phone charged in the flagship stores in San Francisco and Manhattan Rockefeller Center. They would say to these people, “Would you like us to charge your phone? We will guard it while you shop.” Unexpected luxury. The sales went up 10% because people kept shopping until the phone was fully charged.

TSP Gail Davis | Resilience

Resilience: There’s an uncertainty to making plans that is sort of becoming the reality of how we move forward with just about every personal or business decision today.

 

There are all kinds of outcomes by anticipating a need before you know you need it. That separates the Banana Republic and you as a bureau. “I like working with Gail’s team because they think of every potential thing that could go wrong and a contingency plan to solve it.” Back in the day, your plane was late, you would miss a plane. You are great at getting another speaker there at the last minute. The microphone, battery or power bank goes out. Your remote doesn’t work. A hundred and one things can go wrong in a live event and you still have to be able to perform.

I had a situation where we had done little tech rehearsals on virtual in addition to the prep call. They were using a different platform besides Zoom or Microsoft. It had not been tested. They had not tested 300 people coming on at the same time, which caused the bandwidth to stop. They were freezing. Luckily, I had somebody on as my tech backup because as a sales keynote speaker, I’m used to people in the corner running the show. I’m not going to go solo on a tech call.

I have somebody on the call with me going, “Your volumes not all right. Something is off with the camera. Let me fix this. My Zoom call can handle 500 people. Let’s all move over to this Zoom link and we will redo the breakout rooms while you are giving the keynote talk so that the workshop will still work as planned.” The client was so grateful because their whole thing almost crashed because of technology. Is it worth it to pay somebody out of my pocket to be on those calls? You bet.

It is funny talking about the challenges and technology. We added to our team one of our logistics managers. She manages all the logistics. She started in the summer of 2019. One day, we realized, “She has never done an in-person event.” She mentioned that in the olden days, it was all about light planes, snowstorms and speakers’ travel delays. It was comical. It was like trying to show someone the old VHS tape and say, “Here is how you plug it in.” She had no frame of reference. She picked it up quickly. She is a rockstar but it was funny that they are talking about digital data. She was a virtual speaker.

All of us have to continually evolve. What I have learned personally is we can never get too comfortable. We all hear people talk about getting out of your comfort zone but you think, “I have invested in learning this skill. I have got a great brand.” You have been in business a long time. “I have a great reputation. My staff is trained,” and then a pandemic hits. You are like, “I get to see if I’m going to reinvent myself. Look at the three possible scenarios, worst-case scenario, scenario number three.” You are still here, not the case through all the bureaus. This transparency and adaptability. The thing I want to double click on that you said, I have not heard many people talk about this and it is so valuable for the listeners is cross-training your team building empathy. There is The Great Resignation happening.

[bctt tweet=”We don’t know what we don’t know.” username=”John_Livesay”]

A lot of our clients are saying, “How can I keep my team from leaving? I have some superstars. I don’t want to have them leave.” I have found that helping companies not only create case stories to help them win more business but getting individual people to tell their story of origin. What got you into healthcare? What got you into the speaking business? They start to find out things about each other that they never knew. It is fascinating to hear other people’s case stories.

For example, with a healthcare client, they said, “My mom was a nurse. That is what got me into it. I was a microbiologist. I didn’t want to spend my life behind a microscope.” “We worked with you for three years. We never knew that about you.” The management and sales teams are telling me, “We feel like we are losing the bond because we haven’t been able to see our sales team in person.” Now that you have had them put their story of origins together on this repository map with their case stories, they feel seen, heard and appreciated in a whole new way.

It has become an onboarding tool for HR that they say, “Get to know your co-workers, share their stories until you make your first sale but also get to know them as people.” What we live for in the speaking business is if a storytelling speaker can impact a culture that, “I’m hired to help you win more sales but if I can help you break down silos because all these stories live in one place and you can start sharing the stories and make introductions to other divisions, that is the joy of all of this.” What you have done here is a role model for all business owners. You have a culture and from day one you say, “It is not just this job description. If that is your mindset, that is not the culture fit here.” Brené Brown’s latest book talks about that. In her people, she was like, “If you walk by a piece of trash and go, ‘That is not my job. I’m not picking it up. That is not why I worked here.’”

A part of the way we developed empathy during the pandemic is each month we would have what we call the leadership meeting. We might have done it weekly at that point. We did Brené’s book, Dare to Lead. The team got super vulnerable. They do the exercises. They would share. It is your point of getting to know their entire story not just, “This is Susie Q over here doing an account.” It is super important.

We start to remember, “Everyone had some challenges in their life or this is something they have always dreamed of doing.” Like your wonderful story of origin. From EDS to hearing a speaker in that launching. Companies need a story. We all want to connect emotionally. That is what the stories do. You have such a great story. I am so excited and thrilled to hear how successful you are continuing to be. If you have survived this, you can survive anything. Any last thought or piece of advice you want to leave our readers on how to embrace the ongoing disruption and changes that we know are going to be part of life now?

TSP Gail Davis | Resilience

Resilience: We need to watch our language when we hear ourselves. We all want this pandemic to be over. But we can’t control it so we have to reframe our mindset. And we have to look for the gifts. We have to look for the opportunity and we have to take that skill that we’ve developed of anticipating changes.

 

Once someone gave me a book. It was one of those little flipbooks that you go through but the cover said, “Normal Is Just a Setting on Your Dryer.” There is something to that. We need to watch our language when we hear ourselves. Sometimes I’m so tired, I want this to be over. I wanted to go back to the way it was. I want it to be normal. We have to reframe it. We have to look for gifts and opportunities. We have to take that skill that we have developed of anticipating and anticipate what else can change. How else could we modify this? How else can we take this forward? It’s a shift and muscle we have exercised ad nauseam. We will be well-served if we tend to lean into that.

Imagine if you never worked out and then suddenly you had an emergency where you had to swim, run or something. If you keep that muscle active, I’m adaptable and flexible we will go full circle in the lifeguard analogy again. We had to train. When someone was flailing their arms and you couldn’t throw them a buoy because they were too panicked, you knew, “I’m going to have to go in.” Let’s go and embrace the new world. Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful stories with us.

Thank you. It was great. You are always such a good person to visit with. I love it.

Likewise, Gail.

 

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What Do You Have In Common With Lady Gaga and Hugh Jackman?

Posted by Cristen Fitzpatrick in blog | 0 comments

While you may not be a famous singer or movie star, you have more in common with these two than you might think. Both of them put themselves out there in a big way! Both of them are very vulnerable on their social media posts. Both of them have been snubbed or criticized in ways that would devastate most of us.

 

If you never put yourself out there, the illusion you have created is that you will be safe and never get hurt.

In October of 2009, I was laid off from my job at Conde Nast during a time when the mortgage crisis was impacting many businesses’ sales. I realized I had to reinvent myself and learn how to go from selling print ads to selling digital ads. The Daily Beast was hiring, and I put everything I had into getting a job there including paying to fly myself to NY for an interview at a time when I did not have any money coming in. (I told them I was coming to New York to see friends so it would be great to get an interview since I’d be in town anyway.)

One of my friends asked me, “Why are you trying so hard after you just got laid off? Take the rest of the year off to lick your wounds. Won’t you feel horrible if you put yourself out there and don’t get the job?” My response was “I’d rather give it everything I’ve got and get a no rather than hold back from fear of rejection.”

We all have the decision to go for it and let the chips fall where they may without any attachment to the outcome. In this case, I did get the sales job at The Daily Beast. They told me they loved my passion and energy.

Now as a sales keynote speaker, I often get hired once the event planner has interviewed me and the other speakers they are considering because they say “We like your energy.”

Remember: People buy your energy! Money is just energy in action.  When you have a story of why you love what you are doing and can paint a picture of what the future will be like working with you, people want to go on a journey with you.

How did Lady Gaga put herself out there? The first step from going from being a singer to being an actress was her successful debut in A Star is Born. More recently, she starred in House of Gucci where she does not sing, and she was actively campaigning for an Oscar nomination for best actress. Despite getting early buzz and other acting award nominations, and being predicted to be nominated by the oddsmakers, she was “snubbed” by the Academy.

But instead of being bitter, her first social media post after the nominations was to congratulate her friend who was nominated for an Oscar in makeup and hairstyling. She then went on to say, “To all the nominees this year, congratulations on all your hard work, dedication, your nomination,” and she ended with, “your ability to tell amazing stories is a gift to the whole world.”

That is the type of energy to put out into the world.

If you put out bitter words or disappear out of anger or embarrassment, you are putting out a story that nobody wants to hear.

How did Hugh Jackman put himself out there? He agreed to star in The Music Man on Broadway and dedicated himself to learning how to tap dance. The show had so many obstacles with COVID causing it to shut down, and then both he and his co-star Sutton Foster got sick. Luckily for me, I was able to see Hugh Jackman in a preview performance on December 27, 2021, and nobody has more heart and energy when they are on stage. As they say in sports, he left it all on the field (or, in this case, on the stage).

On the night I saw The Music Man, Jackman performed with the understudy who filled in for Sutton Foster. He gave an emotional talk at the end of her first performance, and he sang her praises and those of all the understudies who allow shows to go on. The video of it went viral.

On December 28, Jackman announced he had COVID and the show closed for the next two weeks.  After both Jackman and Sutton recovered, they went back to performing in mid-January. On his Instagram posts, he was doing a countdown until the big opening night in February when critics would come.

The show was a huge hit, and many theatergoers bought tickets in advance. Still, Broadway shows typically rely on great reviews for ticket sales.

The reviews were mixed at best. Variety says “Hugh Jackman shines,” where the NY Times says “Even with Hugh Jackman, The Music Man Falls Flat.”

How do Hugh Jackman and his cast go out there the next night and not let the negative reviews cause their light to dim? In the same way, you can let go of others’ “negative reviews” or criticisms.

Use the 555 method found in my new book The Sale Is in the Tale.

 

What is the 555 method?

 

You think of yourself as the movie director of your own life. When you get rejected, feel disappointed, or even frustrated, you yell “CUT” in your head. You zoom out and ask yourself:

Will this matter in 5 minutes?
Will this matter in 5 hours?
Will this matter in 5 days?

If the answer is Yes, then 555 again! 

5 weeks?
5 months?
5 years?


The response to this new tool has been so rewarding to me as a sales keynote speaker who puts out new content as a leap of faith it will help people.

Here are some of the comments:

     Got A Problem? 555 it!

     Love the approach!!!! I just 555’d something this morning

     Would you keep your hand on a hot stove for more than a second? No! The pain is important for a second, then whoosh! Pull back! Use the 555 method

     I love this 555 method. It really doesn’t matter 5 hours from now….unless it is a BIG thing in your life. WE can’t give the little things so much energy.

 

Next time you get snubbed or get a negative review on your performance, do what Lady Gaga and Hugh Jackman did. Zoom out and don’t let others’ opinions of whether you are a star or not stop you from telling your story!

And if you are seeking a sales keynote speaker to teach your team how to tell stories that tug at the heartstrings so people who open their purse strings, reach out to me here.